Back where I come from.

I've failed miserably at communicating with the rest of the world since I left Uganda and moved back to Nebraska. Turns out that re-entering your home culture is stressful. It's this strange mix of feeling right at home, and yet completely out of place, feeling guilty for feeling that way, and struggling to process all of those different and mixed up feelings.  

So in the midst of waiting to know what's next, figuring it out, and rediscovering my place in America, here's what I've been doing these days: 

Working at the produce farm.

A day of work consists of going to the farm, driving the truck of produce to the stand, unloading the truck, setting up the stand, working with Americans who come to the produce stand all day, loading the truck back up, driving the truck back to the shed, unloading the truck and going home. Not bad, right? For me, it's a day of hard work, a source of income, and a bit of sanity. 

Most people know that I don't have a car (due to an unfortunate accident that happened while I was in Uganda). And, as dumb as it sounds, it's kind of hard to live in the Midwest without a mode of transportation. I'm unable to commit to meeting with anyone or go to anything, which makes me sound even more noncommittal than I already am. Not having a car raises my stress level, continues to make me more flexible, and increases my exercise output. So instead of having my little 2007 silver Pontiac to drive around , I ride a little silver bike gets me to work and back, to some of my friends' homes, to the post office, and to the little town convenience store.

Once in a blue moon, I decide, or defer, to walking instead...

And when I'm too lazy to do either of those, my newest mode of travel is...

...hitchhiking! (Just kidding :) )

Once I make the trek to work in the morning, it's another hope and prayer to make it into the produce stand each day. The 1986 Ford truck that we drive has a few qualities that give it a character of it's own. One of those being that to get it to run, you have to take a pair of pliers, grip on to some kind of wire, and push hard, while pumping the gas pedal with persistence. Turning the key in the truck doesn't do much to make it run properly, except that if you forget to turn the key, the steering wheel remains locked (not that I've had any miniature heart attacks trying to figure out why I couldn't turn the wheel or anything...) Other than that, once you get the truck going, it works like a charm. This week, though, we've actually had this little issue with the truck fixed! And, for the first time in a long time turning the key causes the engine to run!

After I arrive at the stand, I work on getting it opened up. I sort the produce so that our customers get quality fruits and vegetables, update the price board, and begin unloading the 25 boxes and one hundred melons that are packed on the back of the truck. It's a great workout/diet plan in this 100+ degree weather.

My favorite part of working the stand is working with people. I love the relationships I'm able to make with people who return day after day, year after year. It's fun to see the change and development in people's lives over time. However, there's a whole other dynamic to working with people that stretches my patience level and causes me to take a sharp inward look at my heart. I'm blaming it on reverse culture shock.

So, I'm living in America with my fellow Americans. I hear things and I say things that sometimes make me cringe. I get swallowed up in the busy, worrisome ways of society, and it takes but a moment of stepping back to realize that the things I spend my time worrying about aren't what I was created for anyway. So in the midst of the organized - yet crazy fast traffic, hectic schedules, unlimited texting and calling minutes, and endless to-do lists, there are lots of beautiful things about this place too, and here are a few that I'm rejoicing in: 

• Time with family and friends
• Scooter's Coffee
• My church family
• Summer nights and country music
• Sleeping in my bed
• Running on flat land

There are plenty of others, too, including going out to eat, driving on highways and interstates, unlimited high speed internet, frozen yogurt and bookstores. But, no matter where I am, it's always the people God places in my life who make it the most enjoyable for me.